well i had an amazing night last night, it started off a little slow, but picked up from there..

I called david yesterday afternoon to see if he was going to come with holly and i to the john and so he said he was, and i said that i'd come over before hand, for whatever reason.. after i talked to him i went up to Select Video and rent some movies and then went over to Ben's. we watched Loser, and then I came home and started getting ready to go out.

at about 8 I headed over to david's, and I saw holly in the store and went and said hi, she didn't think that david was there, but i went and tried anyway and he wasn't so i got her keys and watched some curling.. how cool is that? anyway holly got home a little bit later and we figured that david was probably still at Snooty, so she went to get ready, an then david came home. he and tall dave didn't go until later, so he didn't get back until later.. then we left for the bar, blah blah blah.

it was good night, corelli was there and d and holly of course. I saw Scott Kerslake form high school, which is so bizarre. it was kind of funny because daryl had seen a girl that he went to high school with earlier that night. it was a night of reunions.

it's strange, ben and i never go out to the bar together, like almost never.. it's gotten to the point where i think it would be weird if he was there, i'd feel like he was intruding on my megan time.

this is definitely the strangest relationship i've ever been in, and i've been in some pretty strange ones.. we've been together for 6 months this week and not once have we talked about anything serious. i mean within our relationship. no 'i love you's, future planning nothing, which i think is good because i don't see us together in the future.. we're way too different.. but for now it's convenient.

the biggest thing i worry about is when it becomes inconvenient, when i meet someone that i have a deeper connection with.

sometimes i think that i'm not the right person to attract the people that i want to attract. i mean i really don't have a problem attracting people.. i seem to do all right in that field, and i've somehow attracted some pretty amazing people over the course of my 20 years, but either i've had some issues with myself or them that at the time i wasn't able to get over, maybe i'll never be able to get over them.. maybe someday i'll stumble into something amazing. i like the concept of true love, of fining someone you just want to be with all the time, that you're willing to compromise with, who takes you seriously, and understands your humour at the same time..